Praying, Embroidering, Thinking of You

Sitting here . . my day a day of prayer and fasting . . I have allowed hurtful words to affect me beyond reason . . . to cause me to sit scared to be me . . to be open and loving to you . .  
I have prayed so hard for guidance from God . . a sure sign you are the one . . something more reliable than my heart (it loves to lead me down blind alleys). . . 
I look at your sweet face and long for a chat . . for time where we can just sit and talk about anything/everything! I wait hopeful you will come talk to me ..  but I allowed myself to be scared to even barely say "hi" as I knew my voice would betray my feelings . . 
Meanwhile I have cleared past relationships from my life (making sure I could give 100% to you). . 
Come sit beside me . . tell me how you've been and all God is doing in your life . .